The evening that was ...

Boo-tackular and b-elicious! Halloween of course. Kochunni dressed up like his favorite character “Bob the builder” with a tool belt, orange vest and light brown suspenders’. And even if I say so myself, he was just too cute!

First stop, his amma’s Spooktacular party last Wednesday … I picked up the little fella from daycare right after naptime and drove him to the party and he even got to see my little cube, he kept saying “Amma office” – finally (I guess) he was happy to see that his dear mother disappeared each day to this 4 by 4 place rather than some exotic location! There was candy, little games and a walk of fame that he enjoyed at the party. A sort of dry run to the actual event.

On Friday, after much debate of either taking him to the mall or just to the couple of houses down the street, we decided to call on our friend. Luckily, with the mom resting with her newborn she was happy to leave her older girl at our house to go trick-o-treating. Kochunni was happy and followed his chechi (elder sister) to every house in the neighborhood that had a light on, banged his hammer on the door and repeated “trick or teeet” and a little Thank you. He did not understand what one was supposed to do after the people deposited the candy in his pumpkin and at one house he even left it right there and came running back to me!

Finally as it started to drizzle we headed back home, to give some kids who came by our house, some candy. At last count, Kochunni’s chechi had 37 candies while he had around 25. Though neither were allowed to eat any, one because she had just lost her two teeth and was told sternly by the doctor – no candy today or your teeth will bleed, and the other because for one more year, he doesn’t exactly know what candies are! :D

But now though the bigger question, what do I do with the 25 candies + the two bags of candy that I bought? Maybe the witches of Halloween would come by and make it disappear. Poof!

Happy Halloween!

Happy Diwali

Wish you all a very happy diwali, may the lights shine on you and your family and bring you all the happiness.

We celebrated Diwali in grand style this weekend at the temple where I got some henna done on my hands and Kochunni wore the kurta that we had bought for his first birthday. At first he was freaked out by the outfit and kept trying to pull it off his head, when finally I showed him his dad’s kurta he was satisfied that this was not some atrocious “girly” outfit! :D

The Diwali mela was nice, with lots of music, food, dance by kids to popular songs like 'Pappu cant dance' and 'Krazzy 4'. It was amazing how many picked on these same songs, but still managed to come up with totally different styles to each. Kochunni enjoyed these numbers extremely and was dancing in the chair, reminding me that next year he could on stage.

At home, these past few days we lit up a few diyas and enjoyed family time. It was a cute sight as I lit the diyas, Kochunni standing right next to me folding his hands in prayer. I hope that one day I could be in India during this time for him to also enjoy some firecrackers and the sparkles all over. But with the festive season beginning there is lots to look forward ...

Are TV shows changing?

Please tell me that they are…. For I do long for a change. When we ordered Direct TV last year I had hoped that watching some good old desi-TV would be a good break from the reality TV shows that now have filled up most of the prime spots on the television. When horrors I realized that the soaps with its regressive values still run the gamut of Indian television! Have you seen the ad for Grihasti – what with the some 7 odd women who have ‘lost their only male support’ Are you kidding me? Reading the news today about the end of the Kyunki saga – brings a little cheer in me. Could it be possible that Indian TV is moving to something more that these oft written lines of “Maa, Bahu, Saas, and the exploitative family members? How can one person be all good and another all evil, has never made sense to me. Add to this the background score of each of these shows - what’s with big drum roll for every turn the eye makes!

Maybe just maybe things will change? At our friends request we watched the show Akkara Kazhchakal on YouTube to realize that better shows could come into existence if only, people cared. The basic premise of the show is to show a Malayalam family living in the US – the daily trials and tribulations that they could face – all with a dose of humor often exaggerated situations but that which anyone who has lived here for a while could relate to. The show is not like a typical soap opera but looks more like a mirrors the daily life - not the dressed up poor bahu and the her saas always eating something.

So here’s hoping for a well deserved change.

Can we do this?

Its Blog Action Day TODAY! I think it should be an ACTION day every day, even every minute if possible.

India is one of the biggest growing nations these days, people seem to have enough cash to buy their iPODs/iPhones to their Swifts and everything in between. Places are lined with malls, inviting the wealthy to spend. Turn around, do you see that little street urchin who hasn’t had a proper meal possibly for two days straight?

Yesterday’s BBC news had this article on their front page - Hunger in India states 'alarming' – as I read it I remember the incident a few weeks ago when honey had to run to Safeway to get a pack of diapers that we ran out on. It seems that electricity had gone out for a couple of hours before at Safeway and now they were instructing employees to take the milk and other frozen items out to be thrown away. YES thrown away … because of the liability issue! Both husband and I racked our brains on what they could have done instead – called some other Safeway location and transferred some stuff there – of course transport could be an issue. Called up a local charity/orphanage and donate at least in part? Again liability issue. I am sure if it was India, they probably could have just yelled and in a hour all the stuff would be taken away within minutes by the poor. But nothing of that sort happened and I guess the food was taken away to be dumped!

I felt so helpless that day and even today when I think about the incident. I regret not being able to do anything!

But it doesn’t stop me from doing things I can do today and everyday. I admit these are small things, but “boond boond se sagar bana” (little drops makes the ocean).

1. Stop buying truckloads of bottled water – get a filter instead and use tap water. Take a bottle to office, so you don’t use the paper cups or bottle water.
2. Don’t waste food. Period.
3. Recycle, Reuse.
4. Plant something.
5. Donate.
6. Shout at honey or little Kochunni or anyone if I see the tap left open while they are brushing their teeth (they are getting much better about it, these days).

Here’s more.

Go ahead, do something. Like John F. Kennedy said "...ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country" your World. Just do the little things and hope that there’s still a beautiful world left when our kids & grand kids grows up!

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Please do join the Blog Action Day - 2008, if you can. Go ahead, and do tell me if you do!


Image from: BBC News and Blog Action day site

So many words, yet so little

There was talk on a radio show that I often listen to on my way to work about Ivana Trump getting married to her boyfriend who is quite a few years younger to her. They kept calling her a “couger”. Now, in reality couger is a mountain lion or panther – a beautiful animal native to the Americas. But here the reference is more of an older woman who preys on younger men. Note the word is even the #1 buzz word according to Time.

This got me thinking how many words we use to describe woman’s exploits and some of it is just not fair ...A married man dating another woman is just a cheat but his girlfriend becomes a mistress, if the situation were reversed the man still doesn’t have an equivalent to the word mistress while the women would be called a b**ch. Again the word is not ugly by itself – it’s just the female of the dog specie – an animal who is loyal and cute; but the connotations it draws in the minds of people is of a hard core woman who will do anything to get what she wants.

Of course, you might argue, that one should love being called a couger for the matter of empowerment and all. I mean here is this reversal of the typical December-May romance. But calling any human being with an animal name is never in my books a good thing? Not that an animal is anyways better or worse than humans, it just doesn’t seem fair to either species. What say you?

(image from: http://weblogs.cltv.com)

Angels

Saturday, honey came back from a two week long trip to India and it was perfect. Kochunni got tons of books that my mom sent, a little wrist watch and even a wooden car that he played around for hours on end. Of course poor honey was tired from jet lag, but the little fella wanted to do everything with his “Acha” (daddy) – from sleeping on his shoulder to playing.

By Sunday he was in full swing with all his parental duties. When evening came, we decided to go out and get his car cleaned up for office today. Of course we ran late and the place that we usually go to closed up at 6 PM. Since the car was dirty we decided to stop at this new place. Five minutes into the thing made us realize that they were less efficient than the ones we normally go to – and this would take more than half hour to get the job done. It was cold and already getting dark, I was sure Kochunni would get bored within a few minutes and looked around on what could be done.

Right opposite to us was a pumpkin patch and I decided that might be the best thing for me to do with the little fella. We walked across the street, the little guy holding my hand and exclaiming at all the cars that were going past right beside us. When we reached the counter he was exited and when I finally let him loose in the little jumper his joy knew no bounds. He jumped, he tumbled and he flipped to his heart’s content. After a little while, I asked him to come out thinking that it might be best to start our walk back to the car.

As he came out, he saw the little stairs going up for the big kids to come down the slide. He asked me, could I go amma? I was skeptical and answered back, sweetheart I can’t come there with you, you will have to go on your own, can you do that? He immediately looked straight into my eyes and nodded his head in a yes. I was surprised and little worried. I knew he would not get hurt being an air jumper set but still he could tumble down and get frightened. I again tried to explain that you need to go alone, can you do it? He started to pull my hand towards it. I finally decided to let him go and helped him climb the first two steps. As I looked, he walked up the first few stairs and then as the little stairs started to curve at the top, he was on all fours. My heart beat a little faster but I noticed that the girl right behind him, instead of pushing past him, was beginning to help him. I smiled and realized that there was now a queue of kids behind, and as the girl did not go past him, everyone had slowed down to meet Kochunni’s pace. I walked over to the side of the slide and waited for the little guy to emerge. Right at the top, he looked down and smiled and when I asked him to come down (almost afraid that he might just sit there) he perfectly did what I had asked of him at every other slide he has been too – sit down and move up close to the slide and then come down smoothly. Due to the big slope he just whipped down in an instant and with a triumphant smile walked over. I was beaming with joy!

Of course, one time is never enough and he asked “Eeniyum” (again), I gently reminded him we need to leave and started to dial hubby’s number, they were already done with the cleanup and were on their way. Kochunni was still pulling me to the steps and trying to climb the first step, as I quickly hung up the phone and helped him on. This time right after the first few steps he fell and almost slid backwards. As I shouted to Kochunni to be careful and hold the edges, a little boy probably around 4-5 turned around and asked me “Should I help him?” Of course, please do. So this time the boy helped him all the way and even waited for Kochunni to finish his slide before plunging himself. I yelled a big thank you and asked Kochunni to do the same.

As I walked Kochunni back, I realized what great kids the two kids were, I probably forget their faces in a few days and only remember some varied details like the girls pink and white sweater and boy’s dark blue shirt and trousers and curly mop of hair. But what they showed me yesterday was that even without any adult supervision kids are intrinsically good, not bullies nor little terrors that we often imagine them to be!

Thank you, my two angels for helping my son to do the things he ought to be doing, to let him grow just a little today! I hope one day Kochunni repays our debt and helps some other hapless little 2 year old.

No man's land

In high hopes that Kochunni will be trained to sleep on his own, in his own room, we moved him to his room that has all the things a boy could desire (or so we hoped). We had painted the room a nice shade of blue and adorned one wall with pictures of cute animals – a hippo, a giraffe, an elephant. A nice placard displaying his name in bright orange colors. A little night-light atop the dresser. After great reluctance at the said move (read cries of horrors) I had this brilliant idea of sleeping next to his crib in the small bed pulled up close to him to help him sleep and once he was asleep I would move back to our room. In theory doesn’t this seem like a great plan?

Now let me show you some loopholes – One he hasn’t yet mastered the plan of sleeping through the night, which means around 11 or if we were lucky around 4-5 AM he would yell “Ammmmmma” And I had to run from our room to his and get into bed with him. Not that I minded sleeping with him – it was just the knowledge that he might call that made it harder to sleep well. There have been nights when I woke up with a start walked to his room and realized the little fella was sound asleep. Another big loophole is that I have supposedly left with no room in my own house!

Let me explain, when I lie down with him during the night after our little prayer we talk about this and that (insert cars and trucks). Sometimes when he seems restless and not wanting to sleep I would complain and tell him to be quiet since daddy, grandma and his amma now want to sleep. One time this led to a sudden revelation & Kochunni mentioned that his grandma occupies the middle room, his dad the AC room while he sleeps in his room. Of course, I couldn’t resist his reasoning and tried to explore further, so what about amma, I ask. Doesn’t his amma have a room? Poor boy he was at a loss of words for once. I laughed and let it go, that is until yesterday when I posed the same question. This time he had an answer. He looked straight into my eye and said “Amma lavele chaachi” (Amma you sleep in the morning).

So now I am left with no room, having to sleep when all the world is awake. Thank you, dear son that’s just wonderful.

Tag - Random Questions

Mystic Margarita tagged me to doing some real soul-searching, so here goes:

The rules for the tag are:
RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
RULE #2 Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
A modified version of the 5 stages of grief – Anger, Depression, Anger again, possible Revenge, and then Acceptance . Of course, the relationship will not last and I would walk out into the sunset.

2. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?
Everyone be happy and Thrive

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?
Kochunni – but since I have promised myself not to hit the little fella, I guess he goes scott-free!

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
Quit work, go on a world tour with bags full of shoes, bags and just STUFF!

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
Nope.
6. Which is more blessed: loving someone or being loved by someone?
Tough cookie. Being loved by someone because that means you are doing something right in this world.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you love?
Till death.

8. If the person you secretly like is attached, what will you do?
Move on.
9. If you could root for one social cause, what would it be?
Would have to be two – Child Abuse and Ecological Destruction

10. What takes you down the fastest?
Something untrue that someone might say

11. Where do you see yourself in 10 years time?
An old, uncool mom of a teenager!

12. What’s your fear?
Losing my family

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
An enigmatic person, who is mysteriously beautiful and intelligent!

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?
Married to my lover and be poor.

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
Go back to sleep.

16. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously who will you pick?
Don’t think that’s possible in this lifetime.

17. Would you give all in a relationship?
YES!

18. Would you forgive and forget someone no matter how horrible a thing he has done?
Nope. A true scorpion. Once bitten you are in my black list FOREVER :D

19. Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?
The relationship I am in.

20. List of 6 people to tag: Take it up if you like, not doing any linking right now! Way too lazy and still have another tag to do …

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Here’s another tag from Tessie , which is almost along the same lines:

1. What have you realized recently?
That I am a mom first, and so always will come second!

2. Have you given your first kiss away?
Yup!

3. If you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 11 blog buddies you would take? The question should be if they will want to come with me?

4. Where is the place you want to go the most?
Amchi Mumbai – this place will always have a soft corner for me

5. If you have one dream to come true, what would it be? (see above)
6. Do you believe in seeing the rainbow after the rain?
Yes, always look out for them too!

7. What are you afraid of losing the most now? (see above)
8. If you win $1 million, what would you do? (see above)

9.If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
Already did!

10. List out 3 good points about the person who tagged you.
Great writer, Sweet girl, Uber cool

11.What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
“Requirements” – LOL that sounds like I can make him out from a science lab. Wish it was that easy!

12.What type of people do you hate the most?
Liars, Cheaters, people with double standards

13. What is the one thing you can’t live without?
Air, My Family

14. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
Throw a hint first and see how I react and then decide to speak up or shut up! ;)

15. Are you a shopaholic or not?
Window shopper yes.

16.Find a word to describe the person who tagged you
Writer

17.If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
My temper

18. What’s the last shocking thing you’ve seen or heard?
The earth is round! Still reeling from that one! :D

19. Would you rather have love but no money or money but no love? (see above)


So there ends the tags .... had fun folks?

Two in a row ...

That does mean I am becoming popular, right. Thanks Ray for this wonderful award …. Just have to figure out if I cash this thing, right!? LOL!



In keeping with tradition I pass on this award to some very good friends ~

The ‘Mystic’al rock star with a ‘Margarita’ in her hand

The 'glowing’ Ms. Extraordinaire ;)

The lovely Miss whose posts make the ‘highpoint of any day’

An 'exotic mind'

A 'writer' in making.

(you might have won these awards already, but this is just to say, that you guys have touched my hearts time and again)

When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.

~Japanese Proverb

In prosperity our friends know us; in adversity we know our friends.

~ John Churton Collins

Will you be my friend?

Preethi awarded me a Friends Forever award! Yipee-kiee-yay!!! A friend for all seasons, forever and ever, how can I thank you enough, my dear! How abt if I …. (go ahead fill in the blank, I will take it up, scouts honor!) :D


Making friends or rather “choosing your friend” is such a huge responsibility. As kids it doesn’t matter, the little boy smiled I smiled back, the little girl had a beautiful doll so I walked up to her. If they responded they became your good or even best friends. I see that with Kochunni too. When we are at the playground, he will watch other kids for a second – see what they are doing. Then, most of the times, he will look at me questioningly – almost as if to say , can I go amma? I encourage him, unless it’s the big kid going off to the bigger jumper, or the bigger slide – then I tell him you need to grow up a little bit. Kochunni eyes loses its shine for a moment, and it tugs my heart. So I try to compensate, can Amma try to catch you? His face lit’s up again and he is happy. When he does make friends with kids his age at the park, at the birthday party, he enjoys the time spent together. Its wondrous to see the friendship forming. Of course, he is likely to forget it in years to come, but a day will come soon enough when he starts to choose his friends,& I hope he chooses wisely.
Some friendships are meant to be for a lifetime, others dwindle into memories. I guess that’s were today’s Orkut’s and Facebooks helps us. They let us friends find us, updating each others ‘profile’. But in many ways its mere re-acquaintance. Gone are the days when they know so much more about you, when you would plot ways to stay out late or cook up stories to get away from class. But then again, we have all grown up …

When I started to blog, it was merely to write my ideas out, probably a “brand new way” to scrapbooking. But it has become more than that. Even though still a mommy blogger at heart, my soul is starting to fly to places unknown far and wide. My first readers were none others that my parents miles away from home, it became a way for them to connect to me and Kochunni. Along the way, something interesting happened - I made friends. Some through comments left behind, some through the cool shower we organized, some through just browsing around. I have only met one of the girls yet, but I feel like I might know so many more. The boundaries of time, space have not bound us, and we are so in tune to each other. I hope someday very soon, I do meet a lot of them; not that it really matters I guess, but to give each of you a hug for making my day far more interesting that it is really.

In keeping with tradition I pass on this award to some very good friends

DDMom – I hope you are settled down, and come back to the blog-o-sphere with witty tales on your two adorable girls soon

Abha – Here is a girl whose Smile can brighten anyone’s day, and with her little Cubby really makes our days in blog-o-sphere wonderful, plus she is from Bombay – need I say more … You see, Bombaykiers always tend to gravitate towards each other even if we are no longer in Bombay.

NM – If a girl can keep three very dynamic blogs going at the same time, have time to play with her Betu, work her magic at work and basically be a superwoman – come-on don’t you want to call her your friend! :D (Hmm I think you already got one, but you can still be my friend too, right, or maybe Betu can be friends with Kochunni?)

Wunderyearz – She hasn’t been blogging regularly these days, but she was one of my early friends in this blog world. I hope you are doing alright, girl friend.

Mira's Mom – A new friend. I hope our friendship blossoms ….

Ray - A chirpy, vibrant personality. Go check out her blog, but be forewarned that you will be addicted!

Dottie - one word - SUPERCOOLPERSON - ok maybe three, but you get the picture! :D

Kodi’s mom - A doting mom of two great kids, her honest heartwarming posts brings out a smile (read Aww, and ooohs) every time.

I know I am probably missing quite a few, so bear with this old grey-haired lady as she tends to forget stuff way to easily these days. Friends forgive right! :D Hugs!

Paani Paani Re

Kochunni it seems is scared of water (paani), or so we have been led to believe…

This summer I made a lot of efforts in trying to get him to have some water fun … a little plastic pool for him to sit out, a little pichkari (watergun) to spray water with and of course the sprinkler mat for his birthday. But no, none of it made him like water any better. Every time a droplet of water was upon him he would cry his heart out and ask us to change his clothes.

When finally, at a friend’s birthday party, seeing other kids having a ball sitting inside the pool he at least was ready to stand in knee length water & I was overjoyed – but he would not sit down or splash waters like the other kids and instead would wail if water fell upon him. He would much rather play on the jumper that they had.

We tried again two weeks ago on our trip to Santa Cruz boardwalk. And even with his big sister sitting down on the side of the beach, letting the water run all over her, he was too scared to even let his feet get wet. The only thing that worked was for us to carry him around and pretend to dip him in water and let his hands touch the icy cold waters.

My husband of course was very happy to see all this … claiming he has more of “his DNA” than mine. For me, I love water – the beaches, the rain. I could get wet and do a “Main Teri Rani to Raja Mera” number in one gusto. (ok maybe not, just remembered the song when I found it in my old music collection :D)

Finally yesterday we got to see some of his true colors. We were at the local nursery to buy some plants for our front yard. Now this nursery had a some fountains around for display with the water running. Of course, for whatever reason, the plumbing seemed not well done, and there were little rivulets of water running from these fountains. The water mixed with the soil from the other plants was completely mucky. The first time we ran across one of them in the store, Kochunni looked at and walked away. In a little while as I was busy picking flowers, he started to walk over to the water and examine it more closely. Within a few seconds, he figured out the fun it might be to actually jump in the water to make a nice little splash!!!

Where did the innate boyishness come from I wonder? And why did you not tell me my little prince that it was mucky waters that appealed to your senses than the fresh waters from the tap?

Happy Onam 2009

With a small attempt at the traditional pookalam in front of the house, Onam celebrations are at full swing at our house.
Here's wishing everyone a great Onam.

Classic TV, anyone?

My oldest TV memory is not of any shows but about our black and white Crown TV with a shutter that I used to play with.The one show I really remember watching as probably a 5 year old is “Johnny Sokko and His Flying Robot” this was about the time that doordarshan introduced half hour for children. All my kids would end our playtime early and run to watch this show from 7 PM. My favorite being the day that my cousin brother who used to claim everything in Bangalore is sooo much better than Bombay wrote to me after his trip to our place that summer, saying that he missed the show. :D

Much later with DD Metro started, we had shows like 100 (Ek Shuniya Shuniya) a Marathi cop show, and afternoon shows like Trishna. During summer DD Metro had shows from 12-1 just for kids with Baigan Raja, and other short stories etc. So many great shows like Malgudi Days (still love the haunting title music), Byomkesh bakshi (probably my first crush) Dekh Bhai Dekh, Fauji, Circus, Flop Show etc were hot fav's during the time it ran.

When I was around 10-12 Farmaan totally rocked my boat with its love story – the rudeness with which the Nawab dictated to the girl he loved and the way she stood her ground against him made it fun to watch. Great actors and a good plot. Surabhi was another fav that introduced us to Renuka Shahane.

There were other great shows too, though today I don’t remember much about them like – Nupur (Hema Malini), Udaan (Laalita (?) from the Surf ads … totally wanted me to become a cop when I grew up), Wagle ki duniya, Zabaan Sambhalke (though probably Mind your language was far better), Ek Do Teen Char – a kids show, Nukkad and so many more. Of course then there were the mythological ones on Sunday with Ramayana and Mahabharata.

Now memories is one thing but how many of these do you think can stand the test of time? I recently found Fauji on Netflix and ordered the set and towards the end, I was starting to get bored. On the contrary Dekh Bhai Dekh still seemed to tickle me with some of the antics of the Diwan family. Byomkesh Bakshi on you tube was still interesting enough (or maybe I still have a soft spot for the guy). I just noticed that they have Johnny Sokko on Netflix Instant watch – let’s see how that holds up to my childhood memories (this is the reason for this post about long forgotten shows)

Sometimes I do wish we have a "desi" TV land - which showcases the best of classic TV for the new generation.

Question: What were your favorite shows, back then? And which of them do you think you could still watch today?

Ed: Here's a comprehensive list that a blogger has put together. Impressive isn'it?

Are you being served?

Over the weekend we had relatives come over & so we decided a trip to Santa Cruz boardwalk was the best thing to do with three kids - one of whom who really wants to get into the beach, even if she was sick, and one grey haired lady who never denies herself the beach if the possibility arose. So anyway, we made the trip (more on that later). And what fun it was, and after 3 hours of rides, sand and water we decided it was time to come back to reality.

Since it was already 8PM by the time we reached the car, we decided to eat out, before the kids feel asleep in the car ride back. So honey checks his new ultra gadget (phone) and finds a restaurant and the directions for the same. We get there and ask for a table for 8. The owner/manager asks the waiter to join two table together so we can be seated together. We sit down and wait. So good so far, then our luck turns!

Now when you are with kids its a big gamble on what they might or might not eat, so after much discussions, we finally order some rotis, 4 curries and full plate veg birayni that supposdly comes with extra pulav, raita and roti, we were hoping that if the biryani turned out spicy they can at least have the pulav and raita.

When the food finally arrives, the kids love the panner pakoras over everything else. But the mommies wouldn’t let go in trying to add some rice and vegetables into their tummies. So we check with our waiter – where’s the pulav? He apologizes and decides to go & check back with the chef. Comes running back and says Veg Biryani does not come with pulav. We are puzzled and explain it says on your menu and ask him to get the menu and pointdely point it out. He checks the menu and had the decency to look embarrassed and walks up to the owner/manager – explaining the situation. Not sure what is 'really' exchanged between the two but our waiter comes over apologizing that we still cannot have our pulav, but if we switch our order of a curry to a dinner he can get a plate of pulav, raita, roti and salad. We look at each other in disbelief and say “ok Fine”.

Now you would think this was the last straw but no, when the receipt comes for the dinner, they seems to have added extra gratuity just for the fact that we joined two tables!!! WTF!

I have heard stories about bad etiquette at the restaurants before, like the time when my friend saw the waiter check the tip she left behind, but this one takes the cake. I mean I am sure they had enough pulav, raita to offer us, and instead on just saying ‘sorry our mistake’, they pretty much asked us to change our order around to accommodate them! And for what a few extra bucks?!

The food was fine, except maybe a tad too oily, but I wouldn’t go back there ever!

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Edited to add: Just checked online and it looks like they have a history in bad service … wonder how it’s still running!

It’s been years since ...

... I have had an ardent follower, who shows his utmost displeasure at my exclamations of love – the frowning of the brows, the angry look, lifting his hand ready to beat up my poor lover. Before you get any ideas let me introduce you to my dearest little 2 year old – who was royally upset with my husband and I.

What not me the center of your universe, he seemed to want to say. But for once we laughed, and hugged and blew each other a kiss. The poor guy realized that he better be inside the circle of love than out, and so came running to hug onto his father’s legs. We picked him up and blew some kisses to his cheek and he sat there happily satisfied – a look in his face that said – see all’s well now! :D

With a great start to the day, husband and I caught up over lunch- an impromptu lunch date. Of course, we ended up talking about our son, the house and work. But what the heck, we tried a new Middle eastern restaurant, spoke in loud voices over the crowds and generally had a great time.

In the evening we made a trip to the temple and asked for Lord Ganapati’s blessings. Then went out for dinner – where for a change Kochunni was on his best behavior. So there ended a beautiful day.

Happy Anniversary, my dear husband. Here’s to many more years of growing old with you! Cheers!

The long weekend

For the past several years we have routinely made a trip someplace for the Labor Day long weekend – it was our annual anniversary celebration, plus the end of summer getaway – sort of the last hurrah. This year though we had no plans, but it turned out to be one roller coaster ride after all.

On Saturday we decided to make a trip to the Palo Alto Junior Zoo & Museum. It’s really a small place, but packed with lot of fun for toddlers. There are rabbits, turtles, fishes and a small pond for the ducks, and a little “bridge” for Kochunni to walk up and down as if some sort of a king! A miniature cage for the rats, while a darkened corner for the bats and the owl. (Kochunni really got scared of the sleeping owl – it was so huge and was sitting with his eyes closed, reminded me of Dumbledore for some weird reason).

The museum area was fun for the little guy as he tried his hands at every toy around. It’s definitely a place to be, when you have nowhere else to be. I am sure Kochunni will outgrow the place quickly, since it is really a mini zoo cum museum but for the opportunity it provides with its clean surroundings and close to the heart of the bay area and light on the purse (they only ask for a merger $3 donation) it is well worth it. (recommended to all bay area moms and dads)

The next day we decided to make a trip down further to the Oakland Fairyland. Now this is definitely a privatized version of Palo Alto Zoo, and no I am not even comparing it to Disneyland with its acres of attractions and fun.Its definitely not a place to be if you have a kid who is over 3 (max 4) once past that age it’s a sheer waste of time and money. But for a two/three year old it can be fun. For a two year old its more about the slides, the whale (Kochunni was so happy trying to get to the little fishes on the slippery slope) and the little carousal. For a three old who knows all the rhymes and nursery stories, it can probably be a wonderland – with the puppet shows, different set ups based on the stories. As for us, (the grey haired oldies) you can be happy if you see a happy child right! Ah well! Of course, you cannot get in without a child (there is a board at the front desk – No child without adult and no adult without a child) so I guess they are fair. One tip: If you are taking a boy – don’t bother with the Magic key – he is not going to have the patience of inserting it into the boom box and listening to the song, when he can rather run in circles trying to make his mama lose some weight. So if you still have a toddler at your house, do make a trip – don’t compare it to Disneyland and you shall have a day of fun.

By Monday I was down with a cold and woke with my eyes burning hot and heavy (I think it was my husband who brought it home last weekend from office, I just hope the buck stops with me). We decided to call it a movie day and ended up watching one of my favorite police detectives John McClane see what he does best – beat up bad guys at their own game in Live Free and Die Hard. So what if the story had holes in it like the size of the watermelon, if he can still say his famous line “Yippee ki yay …” with a sly smile on his face I am down for another movie all about McClane! :D

So that was our weekend, and I am now looking forward to a short week and of course high hopes for a special day tomorrow! ;) How about you, how was your last weeks of summer?

Flashlight memories

Don't you miss someone when they are gone and you realize how much you depended on them. But until they are gone you find so many faults in them that one would think you would rather not keep in touch with them. I am talking about my laptop (in case anyone was getting any other ideas). Its one of the best love-hate relationships I have had for a longest time now. I was happy for a time when I got a Mac, but now that's gone, & with no real hope of getting another one, I am forever in this limbo of "I hate you, but please don't leave me" mode.

So my PC crashed and I was out of it for more than a week. In the meantime, I was loaned an old rickety one, but that meant slow everything! Horrors of all, I lost all the saved URLs and could not keep in touch with blog friends, (yes I should sign up for a reader, but am too lazy to bother, if you haven't noticed yet that is). On the other hand life moved on, my work load piled as I was out of my PC (yes saying it again) and with two colleagues out on vacation I have additional backing up responsibilities. So in the interest of keeping my blogging up, here's something that I had written in 2002 for my speech class, that I found over the weekend while cleaning up - posting it here for posterity! Enjoy!

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Back during the school years, we had the shift system in Mumbai - primary school was in the afternoons while secondary from 5th through 10th in the mornings (7 through 1PM). Pre-primary or nursery was probably the best times for kids from around 10 to 12. One of the episodes that I still remember vividly occurred while I was still in nursery ...


Coming home from schools, on sunny afternoons had special meaning to my little heart. Amma used to pick us up from nursery and once home a nice hot, delicious lunch was always ready. After a quick nap and a few hours of studies it would be time to play. All my friends would gather at the playground and decide what we were going to do that day. It would be fun, filled with laughter and fights.

But on afternoon my playtime would end. I fell down the stairs, in an attempt to 'catch' my best friend. The incident occurred when the two of us were running up and down our apartment stairs playing catch, while my mom was talking with her's at their doorstep. All I got was a piece of red frock she was wearing and then I tumbled down just and broke my arm. My cries brought Amma running to me and she took me home - she put some Iodex and checked my arm when she realized that it was possibly broken - since it looked twisted. Those were the days when only a few houses had a telephone and cars, plus only a few of the people were at home since it was a working day. She called on one of the elderly couple who had a phone too and asked them if they could call my dad and let him know. The kind uncle not only did the same, he accompanied Amma to the nearby hospital. I don't remember much of that day, as I was most of time
in pain, crying and hungry. I must have dozed into sleep often and once when I woke up it smelt like like an aftermath of fire - everything around me was white tiles and people in white as well (I have hated that color since then). Amma later told me, that she was moved around quite a bit in trying to get to meet with a doctor to check me up - the lines long and day melted away in the throngs of people and noise. The only two other things that I can remember from that day, was being seated in a little park area and seeing my dad walk in, I was very happy to see him - Daddy's girl that I was! :) Another piece that stayed in mind was the ride home, late at night and a few visitors that came by to check up on me (I guess the news had spread by then).

Over the next few days I realized what the doctors visit meant in reality - I could not move my right arm. I could not even see it. My fingers were sticking out of a white plaster around my arm (put to straighten my arm, which was broken). In the days that followed, I could not play, write or even wear my dresses properly. The right arm of the dress would be hanging down since I could not put my arm through it. I was ashamed to go out like that. What would my friends think?

On the other hand, I skipped school, no proper baths and was hand-fed from amma for all meals. It often used to itch, but with the plaster around - nothing could be done. The plaster came off only after a month of tantrums and possible hardships my parents - Amma had to visit one of my school friends and copy all the classwork & homework, so that I wasn't left behind when I rejoined.

But I was finally happy. I could wear my dress, play and even write again. To my little heart it was a great achievement indeed!

Roobaroo

When I started to blog my regular readers were my parents and occasionally my husband. Then I started to get some hits and as I started visiting other blogs, reading, commenting; I started to get a steady readership. Few weeks later I had made friends. Yes friends, who laughed and cried at my parenting blues, friends who stopped by while I was asleep and dropped a kind word that lifted my spirits the next day. Friends who became part of my family. Then of course the mega shower happened that helped build bridges across national boundaries, time zones and continents. It was during this time that I grew closer to DDMom – a woman I have grown to admire, respect and love.

Realizing that we were living so close to each other, we emailed on a possibility of meeting and even setting up play date – with her adorable girls and my brat. We decided on a date, the time, the venue to meet. But it was not meant to be. After weeks of emails & phone calls we decided it was now or never, especially with an impending trip over the horizon.

Quick thinking as she is, DDMom suggested we meet for lunch. So on a warm Thursday afternoon we met at Chipotle (a Mexican restaurant). Munching crisp tacos, we chatted about her final days in the bay area, about our kids (what else) and ourselves. Soon the hour was up & we had to part ways. I had to get back to work, while she had to rush back to Dlittle.

DDMom, I really enjoyed our quickie meeting. It was what I had hoped for (except for my klutz behavior – I misplaced my keys right in my pocket :D) and much much more. I hope you have reached home safely and slowly settling into your new wonderful adventure.

Here’s to your ride!!! Cheers!

YTT

pushed Inspired by Preethi and Homecooked I started to think about adding fodder to the blog while having some fun to. So here I go creating a tag - I present to you the “YTT Tag”

*** Edited: New Tag name, courtesy Ray "Kal, Aaj aur Kal ***

~ The tag copy ~

Two questions in each category answer them and then tag your friends from the blog-o-sphere. (Simple enough right) Leave a comment on their blog letting them know they have been tagged and you are all set.

Yesterday (Kal)
Your oldest memory
What were you doing 10 years ago?
Today (Aaj)
Your first thought today morning
If you built a time capsule today what would it contain?
Tomorrow (Kal)
This year ….
What do you see yourself doing 14 years from now?

~ End Tag details ~

Here's my take at it ...

Yesterday
My oldest memory – My oldest memory is that of when I was probably around a year old when I used to jump around like a frog - don't know why I used to do it, but I recollect doing it while dad used to go to work. I guess it was my way of saying 'bye' :D

What were you doing 10 years ago?- (Ed: lost my earlier comment, in a hurry to hit publish, here's something else from 1998) The awkward first days of college as I tried to make new friends, forming first impressions of teachers who later turned out to be some of the best that I ever came across, the first big crushes from the Poly-Tech guys across from our campus.

Today
Your first thought today morning – Darn it’s Tuesday! It’s going to be a long day, have an evening class to attend from 6.30 thru 9.30 apart from the grinding day at work. Plus the instructor has never been able to finish on time (forget early, he always seems to talk abt the most important stuff past 9.30) :(

If you built a time capsule today what would it contain? - It would contain pictures of family, a strand of black hair (since I am finding a lot more white hairs these days), a snapshot of my blog as it stands today; maybe a little diary with all my thoughts at this moment.

Tomorrow
This year … I shall have completed 8 years of marriage (in Sept). So the 7-year itch is behind us! ;)

What do you see yourself doing 14 years from now? 2022 – Dealing with a teenager... shudders!

There simple enough, please indulge me Ray, HC, Preethi and anyone else. Maybe I will come up with a few more!** hee hee **

To make it to 150 ...

I ask you where are the fodders for your blog, when you really need one? No tags floating in the blog-o-sphere these days, no ‘news’ worthy events that need my two cents! I triple checked my drafts folder & even though there are a few things that I have written, it’s just not perfect yet. I should potentially try Preethi’s route and do a walk down memory lane – but me too lazy at this moment, so here I go, I cheat!

No don't be dis-heartened if you stopped by for a wonderful read [such a pompous a**, am I], I am posing a question for you and would greatly appreciate your feedback.

Answer me this – Is there a direct ratio on women becoming working mothers to their moms who did not or vice-versa for that matter? Just a thought that’s floating around in my mind ...

Tall Tales

Some random chit-chat --

Kochunni goes to a family daycare – basically a daycare that’s run in the back of house, its usually limited to 4-10 kids so has a friendly environment. Currently at his daycare he has a new ‘aunty’. She is a Punjabi lady who doesn’t really chat with you – just smiles and bring Kochunni’s bag to me. I assume she does not know Hindi or English.

A few days ago while getting Kochunni ready for daycare – I said to him
“Get ready soon, don’t we have to go play with your friends” Kochunni goes on to name all his friends. I take the opportunity and ask him about his teachers/aunties – You play with aunty S right. He shakes his head and says I play with Deepa Aunty. I say yes you like her. What about the other aunty? What’s her name? He looks at me for a sec and says “Vasudha” I am impressed. I go on to tell my husband about it. We are extremely pleased at his memory.

That evening while picking him up from daycare I ask Aunty S – so is that new lady’s name Vasudha – she looks surprised and says no. No one here was named Vashudha! We are dumbstruck.

When I get home I ask Kochunni again what is her name – he sticks to his guns – Her name is Vasudha. Rather than fight him, I use a different tactic, Who told you so? I ask. He replies “Achan” (daddy)

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I smell poop. Let’s go Kochunni – need to change the diaper. Noooooooooooo! Come on or you will get a rash soon – lets go.

Unjah!

Huh?

Unjah!

Oh you want to wait 5 minutes?
** nodding his head in a yes **

That’s too long sweetie, let’s go

Moo-nah

Three? Now you want to wait 3 minutes!
Darn! When did you become such a good negotiator?

Celebrations galore

Saturday morning dawned in the K3 household with a flurry of activities. Of course, Kochunni awoke earlier than usual and was surprised to see the front hall decorated with streamers of blue and green. He pointed out the Y and A from the Happy Birthday sign, and called the streamer a W because that’s what it looked like.

The theme for the party was Mickey and friends since we just had a Disneyland visit and Kochunni really loved hanging out with Goofy. Of course, when we decided this initially we had not realized how hard it will be to find Mickey stuff … Safeway has only one Mickey cake - with Mickey and Minnie holding hands sitting on the bench – it looks more like an anniversary cake than one that can be used for a kids party! Friends suggested trying some other specialty cake shops but I was running out of time and this would be pretty expensive too. Suddenly I had a fabulous idea – how about I find some plastic Mickey and friends and use that instead of the topping. I made a trip to the local party store Diddams and all I find is that it has is a teeny-tiny section devoted to Mickey while there are aisles devoted to Thomas the train, Cars, Winnie the pooh and of course 2 aisles the Princess/Pink themes (girls have all the fun - hmph). All poor Mickey got was some cutlery, hats and a little candle. I bought the candle as a backup and went back to Safeway and ordered a Winnie the Pooh cake thinking I can substitute the Pooh to the candle. Luckily the nearest Dollar store finally came to resume where I found Mickey, Goofy and Donald all for a buck!

Now we were all set to rumble. The jumper (bouncer) arrived on time at 10 and once that was set up I quickly showered and dressed up for the party. Honey got a few more chairs from our friends house and our first guests arrived around 11.30 AM. Some great Punjabi food and a Cheese Pizza for the kids was delivered to our doorstep & by lunchtime and we were all set.

As friends trickled in, Kochunni seemed to get more clinger and moody. I wasn’t sure if it was stranger anxiety or something else. Finally of course, he said "Toh-lelah chaachi" (let me sleep on your shoulder). Ah! He wanted his afternoon nap. I was mighty surprised … usually he would not take a seconds rest if we had kids around, but I guess waking up early and the Friday activities took a toll on him. So I put him to sleep. I was a bit sad about this, because he had still not climbed the jumper nor had cut the cake. But what to do if your baby wants to sleep …

The party continued, conversations’ flowed, kids bounced on the jumper. A couple of kids took naps as well. I set up the Step ‘n Splash sprinkler for the older kids and they had a whale of time in water. Then it was time for desert with ice cream and some more jumper time.

Two hours had passed and I decided it was time to wake up Kochunni. I enlisted his best friend and chechi’s help (our friends daughter who lives nearby) to help me wake him up. I knew seeing her he probably would not throw a tantrum. And I was right, and after his usual glass of milk, we decided to cut the cake. Finally Kochunni was smiling and seemed to enjoy all the attention - the nap had worked its magic.

It was almost 4 by this time, but folks hung around, kids played some more. Poo-amma (m-i-l) and her sister set up tea for everyone and everyone relaxed in the backyard. I was finally able to persuade little Kochunni to try the bouncer while I sat on the edge of it. As expected once inside there was no coming back!

Come evening as the last of the guests left, I changed into a more comfortable churidaar and climbed aboard the jumper too. Even the oldies (mil, her sis + husband) tried their hand (leg) at jumper. All in all the party turned out to be a great time for all of us.

Of course, Kochunni’s birthday was not until Monday, but that was just a small family affair. I took the day off and played all day with the little guy – circle time singing songs, hide-an-seek, ring around the rosés. In the evening we went to the temple. One damper came in way of a light cold and cough for the little guy – I guess 2 –days of non stop partying is not such a good thing for him! :D He is much better today, though he gives an occasional cough and then demands “Amma velam” (amma water).

The party is officially now over, but with family around for another week and with a couple of “cool gifts” (yet to be opened) I am sure I can extend the joys some more ...

The party begins...

No drum rolls

No petals dropped from the skies above.

But a baby stepped up into toddlerdom, and the K3 house celebrated it with all the pomp and celebrations it deserved and more.

The celebrations started Thursday night when family arrived. Somehow the advent of family and friends really brings out a little cheer that any celebration deserves. The next morning, when Kochunni learn't that his ettan had arrived from Texas, he was too exited to do anything but go meet them all. Of course, he clung to my hip like I was going to take him to the butcher, but within minutes apprehension gave way to pure joy. The morning rituals done, he was happy to play with his “chachu” and ettan. Elephant rides; non stop singing to the tunes of Lakdi ki kathi and the nursery rhymes enthralled the visitors.

Finally around 10, I pushed honey to take the little guy to the daycare. (We had already planned for a little celebration at the daycare – so he had to go). The house suddenly quiet I turned to get some work done, while honey continued with the house cleaning and last minute shopping. During lunch hour, I set up the goodie bag for the kids at the day care and we were all set to drop by around 3. Every minute passed, looking at the clock – is it time yet I wondered. It felt like the last day in school before the summer vacations – you can’t sit still but you still have the last Math class to attend.

Finally at 3, we set everything into the back of our car and headed to daycare. Instead of going straight to the play area, we stopped at the front, waiting patiently with the teacher S to ensure that kids had woken up from their nap time. After another 10 mins we went in, looking into the 7 pairs of surprised eyes, looking for one pair that almost immediately showed confusion and happiness. Kochunni ran to me and then to his dear Achan, hugged our legs and cried "Aae-daku" (life me up). As I laid the carrot cake down, he came running to me. All the kids, still groggy eyed from their sleep sang beautifully to the “happy birthday tunes”. The cake cut, the kids couldn’t wait to get their hands on it. The kids were more than happy to get their hands on the ice-cream and goodie bag later.

All in all, it turned out well. We said our good-byes to everyone and the teacher hugged little Kochunni good bye.

We got home with a small piece of cake and remainder of the ice-cream for rest of the gang at home. The sugar rush seemed to give the little guy extra energy that I left him at home, to get some t-shirts for dear honey, whose birthday was the next day.

At the mall I decided to treat myself to a pedicure session that turned into a waiting game of – please can you finish this soon? From the looks of it, the girl doing the manicure on the lady sitting next to me started to have some sort of an argument with another girl – possibly about whose turn it was. Its amazing how even without understanding a word of what they said in an Asian language we could figure out what the argument was about.

We finally hurried home to the little guy, who still seemed to be on a sugar rush. A quick dinner and some more games later I put him to bed, hoping that tomorrow he would sleep in so we can get some of the at-home party preparations out of the way!

[To be cont ... ]

2 Year Old

Kochunni

(img courtesy Disney)

Flick'ed

Thanks Ray for this c[cube] (cool, complicated, creative) tag.

Here it is -
1. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.
2. Using only the first page of results, and pick one image.
3. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into Big Huge Lab’s Mosaic Maker to create a mosaic of the picture answers.

The questions:

1. What is your first name?

2. What is your favorite food? right now?

3. What high school did you go to?

4. What is your favorite color?

5. Who is your celebrity crush?

6. What is your favorite drink?

7. What is your dream vacation?

8. What is your favorite dessert?

9. What do you want to be when you grow up?

10. What do you love most in life?

11. What is one word that describes you?

12. What is your user name?

My answer:

Can you guess the answers?

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The preparations for Kochunni's 2nd Birthday party are in full swing. Today there is a small party at the daycare, tomorrow one for all our friends. We have family visiting us so its a full house. So going to be a lull in my posts until next week, in the mean time, enjoy the tag and you guys ( ~nm, Kaycee, Mystic Margarita) go ahead, spend some time idly picking photos! :)

Yes to weekends

Utah is the first to vote for a 3-day weekend, due to soaring gas prices, and according to few an environment friendly action. Whatever it is, would you say “Yes” to longer weekends?

Growing up “weekends” as a concept never hit home. My school (being totally weird) had Thursday’s and Sundays off. Dad had half-days on Saturdays (though he probably made it home on time on Sat about 10 times only) and Sunday’s off. So Sunday was the only day when the entire family was together. All this changed when I landed in US - the meaning, the luxury of having two full days to yourself to do as you please started to make sense. And now that it has, I can be greedy enough to move to Utah just to get the 3-days off :)

Wouldn't you?

More time to spend time idly “Kaling” (coloring) with Kochunni, finger painting butterflies, the suns and stars?

Of course, there are the chores – the cleaning, the scrubbing, the dusting that we need to attend to … but it pays when in the evening you can sit out in your own backyard listening to the birds up on the lemon and orange trees; pluck ripe sweet apricots from the tree and eat to your hearts delight. Read late into the night and sleep in the afternoons, go on long drives ... just about anything to take the monotony of life out.

So what do you say?

Who is that?

Lost on the street’s kindly put me on the tag roll that I had been secretly dying to do! So thanks! :) Don’t know why, but I still want to be tagged before I actually post! :)
**Secretly hoping for a few links to get my blog read by millions! Total World Domination (evil laughter resounding)**

Since this tag was first about literary characters and then "twisted" by Ray , I have decided to spit down the middle to do full justice! ** Am such a good girl right! **

1. Betty (from Archie’s) the eternal girl next door with a good heart, happy go-lucky girl friend!

2. Batman: Like Ray said, the only superhero that is still completely human with no superpower – just gadgets, money and brains!!! Perfect! He remains my favourite among superheroes.

3. Garfield – the perfect smart orange cat

4. The common man by R.K.Laxman the one sane character who generally acts as a silent witness to all the action in the comic "You Said It". When I laid my hands on the Times of India, this was usually the first thing I read.

5. Supandi – Growing up one of staple comics during the good old days of Tinkle (do they publish this anymore?), he was my favorite simpleton (One of his stories below) apart from other regulars like Shikari Shambu, Tantri etc

And now for the Literary characters

6. Darcy + Elizabeth Benet, from Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice. The perfect yin-yang couple!

7. Elinor Dashwood, from Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility. A strong, sensible daughter, who loves her family and has a keen sense of responsibility towards family and friends.

8. Portia, from Shakespeare's Merchant of Venice. Definitely one smart cookie, beautiful, rich and intelligent. Not only does she obey her father’s will she has the determination to pursue her heart.

9. Sirius Black, from the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling. A perfect example of an uncle who loves to care and lives to play mischief. He is a rebel with a cause.

10. Perry Mason from numerous novels by Erle Stanley Gardner. A great lawyer and possibly even better detective, he became my next logical jump from the Nancy Drew series as a schoolgirl.

There is my first ten, might have to do another one to include a few others that I have come to like … some day, soon.

So to continue the tag I ask Friendly Stranger, Ladybird, Preethi, Swati … anyone else want to take up the tag, let me know.

A Suppandi Story (posting from a Flickr post from hexod.us')

Roots

Yesterday evening after dinner we sat around in the living room discussing our options – where will be in the next few years (in terms of a place to call home). Why this sudden urge to discuss such bland topics – because ... no idea, I guess we somehow landed on it!

I remember my childhood days very well; Bombay school (sorry it will be Amchi Bombay to me) was in shifts – primary school in the afternoon and secondary early morning. Either way, after school we would rush home, throw our stuff after a little snack or homework we were off to play. Everyone knew everyone else in the neighborhood. This was our ‘adda’ and we were the rulers.

I don’t see if the same would happen for Kochunni – here the neighbors are friendly but not enough to drop by any time of day to borrow some sugar and chat about the daily grind. People don’t meet each other at the 7:27 local and walk back home together talking about this & that. Here everyone is afraid of stepping into someone else’s space and keeps their distance. Yes it definitely has its moments when you don’t have to worry about a neat and tidy house – you know that no one will come unannounced, and of course you don’t want nosy neighbors. But I wish there was a balance.

I would want a ‘settled’ life for Kochunni from at least age 4 onwards – one place to call home where we can all grow old together - a place that he can fondly remember even if he moves out of it - like I do today. But will I know my neighbor, will there be other kids for Kochunni to call upon – or will I need to set up schedules to have a play-date? Will Kochunni have summers where he and his friends can play what they want – cycling down the street, a heated game of cricket, have hard-core fights over why one played better than other and then make up a minute later; and if nothing else just sit around and chat.

Couple of months back when Amma was here, I was discussing something else and realized that life back in India has changed too. Parents are enrolling kids in all sorts of classes for the kids – computers, music, dance, swimming, apart from the regular tuition classes. Its competitive and the wheels are turning, I wonder if I am looking back with rosy tinted glasses and not seeing the full picture – I mean, I took tuitions too during the last years of school. But I can still relate to time spend idly among friends – the incessant chatter that would stop the moment an adult passed by, the parents meeting up for coffee or just sitting by the large garden and chatting.

Buying a house definitely a first step towards staying put, but with both sets of parents still in India and not many family members here, I wonder if this is place to be. Or am I turning more like my dad who always wished to go back to live in his hometown and still continues to do the same! (Dad, if you read this, please know I totally understand how you feel, more today than when I was a kid & crib about not ever leaving Bombay!)

No decisions yet, I don’t know where I will be 2 years from now, but I hope I can reach a resolution by then – at least I think I need to.

Hack or Spyware?

This is just weird!!!

See the screen shot – that’s one of comments sections from my last post. Now I know I did NOT delete any comments, then how did this happen? Creepy!!

This is the second time this has happened! The last time I was so creep’ed out; I changed my passwords. How can it say Comment deleted by AUTHOR when the Author has not checked the site in that time period?

Is this an early sign of schizophrenia!! **shudder**

Please anyone any thoughts!!

With a pinch of salt

Possibly everyone has seen the desi version of the Simpsons but even as I watched it, I couldn’t help think – please don’t go with the stereotypes again! But of course they do – a 3 year old reading a book on arranged marriages (?!?) well I guess she is reading so I should be happy.

It’s not that the video itself is not funny and I am sure if its going to be a full-fledged show it will be funny, but I am so done with the stereotypes. Especially some that has been exploited in media for the millionth time! Here are few that gets my blood boiling

- South Indian “madrasi” – always with “nariyal pani” (coconut water) and bad Hindi, painted forehead, in the traditional white mundu, and faces painted Black (to showcase darker skin tones).
- Only a “woman” – dressed in sari (or some Indian outfit) can get the man of her dreams. Example - Kuch Kuch Hota Hai (The character played by Shah Rukh only sees beauty via saries, heavy make-up and soft gestures, it’s the same sub-plot in Main Hoon Na, where the girl transforms herself to win the guy she loves – at least here she chides him before accepting his love.
- Goans – If you want to show a Christian family – then they have to be a Goans, of course the dad has to be a drunk, the mom a devout Christian and the heroine – oh so pretty, in short micro-minis running from goondas straight into the arms of a guy (if its a typical Hindi movie it will be Hindu guy from a rich family of course).

The point is that yes, the stereotype might have a grain of truth in them – Hindi is not the first language for many south Indians so yes, they do have an accent – M sounds more like “Yem” when you hear it from a Malayalee – but why not rejoice in this difference?

Moving beyond India and the Indian movies, its still the same – its a Punjabi cab driver you meet in almost all Hollywood movies and tele serials. Its not just limited to India, no I see we are all given the same treatment – its always the Korean grocer, Martial arts specialists etc. Hollywood seems to have built a fantasy for most countries even – romantic get-a-ways always leads to Paris, anything magical/supernatural is explained as part of Chinese/Japanese mythology. Of course this is boost for tourism for Paris and probably interest in Chinese culture, but the stereotypes are unmistakable.

To me the distinction of a negative and a positive stereotype is not about if its funny than it’s appropriate because what is funny to one may not be for another. It’s like the toddler saying the F word without knowing the meaning. When you see it on the tele, it’s funny but if your child said that you would be embarrassed. Why? Its not like the toddler understands the meaning, might even forget the word in a day, but what bothers you is that YOU understand. You know that’s it’s a word that is considered impolite in society. Same thing here, if you come from that part of the world where the stereotype is coming from than its no longer funny, you understand instinctively what it means.

There are a million stereotypes out there, possibly about every community and society, but my biggest angst is that these stereotypes are taken at face value by people and it gets ingrained into their minds – that becomes a true tragedy!

A window into the soul

Mama-mia tagged me to do this tag – present 6 quirky things. Quirky–moi, no way. I am just a great gal, no quirks! :) But lets give it a shot!

These are the rules:
1.Link the person(s) who tagged you
2. Mention the rules on your blog (here they are!)
3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours...
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.

So here I go:
- My knee knuckle breaks (in a sound) ever time I squat. Sorry no-control over it, and I know it drives some people nuts!
- I love making up stories – though when I try to put it in paper, it never flows beautifully.
- Bathroom singer, who isn’t?
- I love music – in the car, on my laptop, at home. And if its good– I sing and dance to it! In office I try to mumble the words to the song and tap my feet. Happy to note, Kochunni is following his Amma’s tradition :)
- Except for the noise of the fan, I like the house and everyone in it to be silent for me to sleep. (One of the things that mom used to use against me, when I would not get up – she would switch on the radio)
- Total visual person – can remember faces but no names, can tell you the way to my house but won’t be able to name the roads. *** evil grin ***

I tag Wonder Yearz, Dottie, Preethi, Lijy, Little Aryan, Ray. Go on tell us about yourself!

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I really like using Firefox – the tabbed browsing, the shortcuts everything so would like to promote their little mission to make it to the Guinness World records, so please do you bit and hit the download D-day tomorrow!!! Lets make browsing safe and fun!

An affair to remember

1 Daughter
2 People
0 Affairs
6 Honeymoons
7 Adoring Nieces & Nephews
Inseparable like the circles of 8

Equals

30 Years of Togetherness and Still Counting.

Yes, that’s my parents for you!!! :)

Happy Anniversary!!!

Who packages these things?

In India, at least until a few years ago the local baniya or nearby general store used to be the place to buy almost everything from dal's to flours, from cookies to spices, from stamps to books, bulbs, scissors, almost anything. The stores are very different from today, in that the shopkeeper would hand out things that you asked for, rather than customers browsing around the shop looking for items. So apart from the packaged brand items like Haldiram sweets or a canned soup everything you get was in loose plastic bags that was wrapped up right in front of you. For example, you could ask for 4 cookies, and two AA batteries. The cookies would be picked out from a glass bottle, while batteries from the shops cupboards. They would be put in little bags for you & you could start to use them right away.

The first time I started encountering individually wrapped items was in US. Apart from vegetables and few other things everything is neatly wrapped away. Not that its a bad idea, but unpacking some of these things needed time, effort and understanding. Its not as simple as opening a cookie box. If you don't check the packaging well you might miss the small text that says "tear here" like on the little ketchup packets and go nuts over not being able to open them while your fries have gone cold.

Apart from this comes the weirdness surrounding packaging. Blub's - a handle-with-care item is packed in little paper mashe while scissors are packed off in this high quality plastic that you would need another high end scissors to open - what if you were buying them for the first time?

Worst offenders now seems to be kids toys.

Last weekend Kochunni got a little School bus from a family friend. She handed over the gift bag to me and today I finally got around to open it. My biggest mistake of course was that I showed the toy to the little guy & he got really exited since he loves anything that remotely looks like a vehicle.


But I still needed to open up the toy from its box- it looked easy enough, just a little cut out box. But I was in for a surprise the bus was held tight with these small hard plastic wires that were twisted around possibly a million times over! Now twisting and turning these 4 wires, held in place with a little green plastic took time and effort. I was glad that honey was holding a now starting to cry baby in his arms. Finally all I was able to do was to remove the bus out of the box and hand off the toy to him with the wires still sticking out.


I guess to remove these would take another 10 mins which I was sure the little guy would rather not wait to lay his hands on his toy. I learned my lesson the hard way, next time open up the damn thing, before I even show a new toy to the little guy!

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Edited to add: Found this Washington Post article that seems to highlight some of the main offenders and the awards that manufactures have won for doing the same!

The K 3 Way

Last week one of my visitors asked me – what K3 means. So here is the story!

At home, my dad used to call me by my pet name (that he coined) which started with the letter K. When honey and I were married, I told him I cannot do the Malayalee traditional way of calling husbands “ettan” or “chettan” for that sounds to brotherly to me (Please understand if you do, I am not saying its bad or good, it's just that I never had an elder brother (not even an elder cousin bro) so the words to me were sort of revered for I always wanted what I could not have - an elder bro!). So after much discussion we came up with, you guessed it – pet names that started with K for each other. This was not intentional, just something that occurred.

Later in US, while I was still an unemployed girl waiting for my work visa to come through, honey knowing my interest in writing and knowing that I was BORED at home introduced me to Blogger and I decided to set up an account more out of curiosity than anything else. Of course, we had numerous discussions on privacy issues prior to this, plus I wanted to come up with a cool name, but I could never settle on anything. So undecided was I that I went from Bag lady, to Girl-Next-Door, to Just-A-Blog to anything in between.

During these days internet had become my new pal and savior. Every day I would browse around to find unique things that piqued my interest. One time, it was Greek mythology, and I came across the name Kyra – the meaning (lady) and the letter – seemed perfect for my profile. Unfortunately I could not get the blog address with this name and had to come up with something else. It was one of the hot summer days that Dallas is famous for and my brain just fa*ted! Since K was the hot favorite of the day and 3 my lucky number I settled on it.

Now of course, back home, with my little Kochunni I was able to continue the tradition of K’s for pet names. So that’s the story of K 3.

Of course, now that I am using blogger a lot more and visiting cool sites with even cooler sounding names, I envy it. Maybe I should go for Kyra since it still does ring like a "cool" name to me! What say you?