The evening that was ...

Boo-tackular and b-elicious! Halloween of course. Kochunni dressed up like his favorite character “Bob the builder” with a tool belt, orange vest and light brown suspenders’. And even if I say so myself, he was just too cute!

First stop, his amma’s Spooktacular party last Wednesday … I picked up the little fella from daycare right after naptime and drove him to the party and he even got to see my little cube, he kept saying “Amma office” – finally (I guess) he was happy to see that his dear mother disappeared each day to this 4 by 4 place rather than some exotic location! There was candy, little games and a walk of fame that he enjoyed at the party. A sort of dry run to the actual event.

On Friday, after much debate of either taking him to the mall or just to the couple of houses down the street, we decided to call on our friend. Luckily, with the mom resting with her newborn she was happy to leave her older girl at our house to go trick-o-treating. Kochunni was happy and followed his chechi (elder sister) to every house in the neighborhood that had a light on, banged his hammer on the door and repeated “trick or teeet” and a little Thank you. He did not understand what one was supposed to do after the people deposited the candy in his pumpkin and at one house he even left it right there and came running back to me!

Finally as it started to drizzle we headed back home, to give some kids who came by our house, some candy. At last count, Kochunni’s chechi had 37 candies while he had around 25. Though neither were allowed to eat any, one because she had just lost her two teeth and was told sternly by the doctor – no candy today or your teeth will bleed, and the other because for one more year, he doesn’t exactly know what candies are! :D

But now though the bigger question, what do I do with the 25 candies + the two bags of candy that I bought? Maybe the witches of Halloween would come by and make it disappear. Poof!

Happy Halloween!

Happy Diwali

Wish you all a very happy diwali, may the lights shine on you and your family and bring you all the happiness.

We celebrated Diwali in grand style this weekend at the temple where I got some henna done on my hands and Kochunni wore the kurta that we had bought for his first birthday. At first he was freaked out by the outfit and kept trying to pull it off his head, when finally I showed him his dad’s kurta he was satisfied that this was not some atrocious “girly” outfit! :D

The Diwali mela was nice, with lots of music, food, dance by kids to popular songs like 'Pappu cant dance' and 'Krazzy 4'. It was amazing how many picked on these same songs, but still managed to come up with totally different styles to each. Kochunni enjoyed these numbers extremely and was dancing in the chair, reminding me that next year he could on stage.

At home, these past few days we lit up a few diyas and enjoyed family time. It was a cute sight as I lit the diyas, Kochunni standing right next to me folding his hands in prayer. I hope that one day I could be in India during this time for him to also enjoy some firecrackers and the sparkles all over. But with the festive season beginning there is lots to look forward ...

Are TV shows changing?

Please tell me that they are…. For I do long for a change. When we ordered Direct TV last year I had hoped that watching some good old desi-TV would be a good break from the reality TV shows that now have filled up most of the prime spots on the television. When horrors I realized that the soaps with its regressive values still run the gamut of Indian television! Have you seen the ad for Grihasti – what with the some 7 odd women who have ‘lost their only male support’ Are you kidding me? Reading the news today about the end of the Kyunki saga – brings a little cheer in me. Could it be possible that Indian TV is moving to something more that these oft written lines of “Maa, Bahu, Saas, and the exploitative family members? How can one person be all good and another all evil, has never made sense to me. Add to this the background score of each of these shows - what’s with big drum roll for every turn the eye makes!

Maybe just maybe things will change? At our friends request we watched the show Akkara Kazhchakal on YouTube to realize that better shows could come into existence if only, people cared. The basic premise of the show is to show a Malayalam family living in the US – the daily trials and tribulations that they could face – all with a dose of humor often exaggerated situations but that which anyone who has lived here for a while could relate to. The show is not like a typical soap opera but looks more like a mirrors the daily life - not the dressed up poor bahu and the her saas always eating something.

So here’s hoping for a well deserved change.

Can we do this?

Its Blog Action Day TODAY! I think it should be an ACTION day every day, even every minute if possible.

India is one of the biggest growing nations these days, people seem to have enough cash to buy their iPODs/iPhones to their Swifts and everything in between. Places are lined with malls, inviting the wealthy to spend. Turn around, do you see that little street urchin who hasn’t had a proper meal possibly for two days straight?

Yesterday’s BBC news had this article on their front page - Hunger in India states 'alarming' – as I read it I remember the incident a few weeks ago when honey had to run to Safeway to get a pack of diapers that we ran out on. It seems that electricity had gone out for a couple of hours before at Safeway and now they were instructing employees to take the milk and other frozen items out to be thrown away. YES thrown away … because of the liability issue! Both husband and I racked our brains on what they could have done instead – called some other Safeway location and transferred some stuff there – of course transport could be an issue. Called up a local charity/orphanage and donate at least in part? Again liability issue. I am sure if it was India, they probably could have just yelled and in a hour all the stuff would be taken away within minutes by the poor. But nothing of that sort happened and I guess the food was taken away to be dumped!

I felt so helpless that day and even today when I think about the incident. I regret not being able to do anything!

But it doesn’t stop me from doing things I can do today and everyday. I admit these are small things, but “boond boond se sagar bana” (little drops makes the ocean).

1. Stop buying truckloads of bottled water – get a filter instead and use tap water. Take a bottle to office, so you don’t use the paper cups or bottle water.
2. Don’t waste food. Period.
3. Recycle, Reuse.
4. Plant something.
5. Donate.
6. Shout at honey or little Kochunni or anyone if I see the tap left open while they are brushing their teeth (they are getting much better about it, these days).

Here’s more.

Go ahead, do something. Like John F. Kennedy said "...ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country" your World. Just do the little things and hope that there’s still a beautiful world left when our kids & grand kids grows up!

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Please do join the Blog Action Day - 2008, if you can. Go ahead, and do tell me if you do!


Image from: BBC News and Blog Action day site

So many words, yet so little

There was talk on a radio show that I often listen to on my way to work about Ivana Trump getting married to her boyfriend who is quite a few years younger to her. They kept calling her a “couger”. Now, in reality couger is a mountain lion or panther – a beautiful animal native to the Americas. But here the reference is more of an older woman who preys on younger men. Note the word is even the #1 buzz word according to Time.

This got me thinking how many words we use to describe woman’s exploits and some of it is just not fair ...A married man dating another woman is just a cheat but his girlfriend becomes a mistress, if the situation were reversed the man still doesn’t have an equivalent to the word mistress while the women would be called a b**ch. Again the word is not ugly by itself – it’s just the female of the dog specie – an animal who is loyal and cute; but the connotations it draws in the minds of people is of a hard core woman who will do anything to get what she wants.

Of course, you might argue, that one should love being called a couger for the matter of empowerment and all. I mean here is this reversal of the typical December-May romance. But calling any human being with an animal name is never in my books a good thing? Not that an animal is anyways better or worse than humans, it just doesn’t seem fair to either species. What say you?

(image from: http://weblogs.cltv.com)

Angels

Saturday, honey came back from a two week long trip to India and it was perfect. Kochunni got tons of books that my mom sent, a little wrist watch and even a wooden car that he played around for hours on end. Of course poor honey was tired from jet lag, but the little fella wanted to do everything with his “Acha” (daddy) – from sleeping on his shoulder to playing.

By Sunday he was in full swing with all his parental duties. When evening came, we decided to go out and get his car cleaned up for office today. Of course we ran late and the place that we usually go to closed up at 6 PM. Since the car was dirty we decided to stop at this new place. Five minutes into the thing made us realize that they were less efficient than the ones we normally go to – and this would take more than half hour to get the job done. It was cold and already getting dark, I was sure Kochunni would get bored within a few minutes and looked around on what could be done.

Right opposite to us was a pumpkin patch and I decided that might be the best thing for me to do with the little fella. We walked across the street, the little guy holding my hand and exclaiming at all the cars that were going past right beside us. When we reached the counter he was exited and when I finally let him loose in the little jumper his joy knew no bounds. He jumped, he tumbled and he flipped to his heart’s content. After a little while, I asked him to come out thinking that it might be best to start our walk back to the car.

As he came out, he saw the little stairs going up for the big kids to come down the slide. He asked me, could I go amma? I was skeptical and answered back, sweetheart I can’t come there with you, you will have to go on your own, can you do that? He immediately looked straight into my eyes and nodded his head in a yes. I was surprised and little worried. I knew he would not get hurt being an air jumper set but still he could tumble down and get frightened. I again tried to explain that you need to go alone, can you do it? He started to pull my hand towards it. I finally decided to let him go and helped him climb the first two steps. As I looked, he walked up the first few stairs and then as the little stairs started to curve at the top, he was on all fours. My heart beat a little faster but I noticed that the girl right behind him, instead of pushing past him, was beginning to help him. I smiled and realized that there was now a queue of kids behind, and as the girl did not go past him, everyone had slowed down to meet Kochunni’s pace. I walked over to the side of the slide and waited for the little guy to emerge. Right at the top, he looked down and smiled and when I asked him to come down (almost afraid that he might just sit there) he perfectly did what I had asked of him at every other slide he has been too – sit down and move up close to the slide and then come down smoothly. Due to the big slope he just whipped down in an instant and with a triumphant smile walked over. I was beaming with joy!

Of course, one time is never enough and he asked “Eeniyum” (again), I gently reminded him we need to leave and started to dial hubby’s number, they were already done with the cleanup and were on their way. Kochunni was still pulling me to the steps and trying to climb the first step, as I quickly hung up the phone and helped him on. This time right after the first few steps he fell and almost slid backwards. As I shouted to Kochunni to be careful and hold the edges, a little boy probably around 4-5 turned around and asked me “Should I help him?” Of course, please do. So this time the boy helped him all the way and even waited for Kochunni to finish his slide before plunging himself. I yelled a big thank you and asked Kochunni to do the same.

As I walked Kochunni back, I realized what great kids the two kids were, I probably forget their faces in a few days and only remember some varied details like the girls pink and white sweater and boy’s dark blue shirt and trousers and curly mop of hair. But what they showed me yesterday was that even without any adult supervision kids are intrinsically good, not bullies nor little terrors that we often imagine them to be!

Thank you, my two angels for helping my son to do the things he ought to be doing, to let him grow just a little today! I hope one day Kochunni repays our debt and helps some other hapless little 2 year old.

No man's land

In high hopes that Kochunni will be trained to sleep on his own, in his own room, we moved him to his room that has all the things a boy could desire (or so we hoped). We had painted the room a nice shade of blue and adorned one wall with pictures of cute animals – a hippo, a giraffe, an elephant. A nice placard displaying his name in bright orange colors. A little night-light atop the dresser. After great reluctance at the said move (read cries of horrors) I had this brilliant idea of sleeping next to his crib in the small bed pulled up close to him to help him sleep and once he was asleep I would move back to our room. In theory doesn’t this seem like a great plan?

Now let me show you some loopholes – One he hasn’t yet mastered the plan of sleeping through the night, which means around 11 or if we were lucky around 4-5 AM he would yell “Ammmmmma” And I had to run from our room to his and get into bed with him. Not that I minded sleeping with him – it was just the knowledge that he might call that made it harder to sleep well. There have been nights when I woke up with a start walked to his room and realized the little fella was sound asleep. Another big loophole is that I have supposedly left with no room in my own house!

Let me explain, when I lie down with him during the night after our little prayer we talk about this and that (insert cars and trucks). Sometimes when he seems restless and not wanting to sleep I would complain and tell him to be quiet since daddy, grandma and his amma now want to sleep. One time this led to a sudden revelation & Kochunni mentioned that his grandma occupies the middle room, his dad the AC room while he sleeps in his room. Of course, I couldn’t resist his reasoning and tried to explore further, so what about amma, I ask. Doesn’t his amma have a room? Poor boy he was at a loss of words for once. I laughed and let it go, that is until yesterday when I posed the same question. This time he had an answer. He looked straight into my eye and said “Amma lavele chaachi” (Amma you sleep in the morning).

So now I am left with no room, having to sleep when all the world is awake. Thank you, dear son that’s just wonderful.