Problem Child

I just came across two blogs “My Many Colored Days” and “Morning Glory” that have started a ‘Women 2 Women’ Tuesday sessions! A wonderful idea, I must add. This will be my first article for the same, though it’s a day late [apologies]

Every big problem was at one time a wee disturbance. -Unknown

How do you define a problem child?

Is it that little boy who came to our house, when I was probably 10-12 and broke my record-player? I don’t remember his name, but I still think of him as a brat. I remember him running around my house and taking everything down. I did not like it and I had an overwhelming feeling of shouting at him to stop. Are his parents to blame who kept saying “Oh he is naughty!” and once in a while, “Don’t do that!”

Is it that girl, my cousin, who refused to eat anything but chocolates and ice-scream for dinner, lunch and anytime in-between? We had to literally force feed her!

Will my son be considered a problem-child by someone, down the road? Probably. Not because he is one, but of the circumstance! I loved my record-player and hated the kid for destroying it. [But I still think his parents should have offered to help – or maybe they did, don’t recall!] I remember one of older girls telling me that I could play with her Barbie doll – since I was now old enough!

If you cannot define a problem-child - then can you ensure your child will not be considered one by others? I have realized that ‘problem-child’ is not the problem … it is the situation, the circumstance. It is not the child that is a problem; it is the parent, the society. How we define a problem and the kid involved is entirely on our perception. We might be impressed by a kid who talks a lot or we might called them a chatterbox; we might be impressed by a kid who loves to play or we might say they are wasting their life; we might be impressed by a kid who reads a lot or we might call them a bookworm!

I know my son will have his moments. When my child misbehaves do I yell at him, feel ashamed and walk away apologetically? Or do I give him a hug; tell myself he is still learning and help him learn the 'worldly-ways' with a smile?

I hope its the latter, for my little Kuttie's sake! :) I wish, I hope, I pray ...